Finishing the Course

"I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith."  

2 Timothy 4:7

Throughout these last 2 months I have really been struggling with a lot of things. There have been things that have happened in the lives of people that I care very much about, health and job issues, and a multitude of other things that have had my emotions on a roller coaster ride. I have been feeling so worn down that I have felt like I just didn't know how much more I could deal with. 

Because of our busy schedule, it is so hard to find time to really sit down and meditate on the Word of God. So often it is 15 minutes before I head out the door for work or 15 minutes before I pass out in bed. As I became more and more disheartened and more and more exhausted, I felt that I needed to find the time (even though I didn't know where from) to meditate on the Word. In Ephesians 6:10 - 18 it talks about the armor of God, which includes His Holy Word. God's Word is to be a strength and a guiding light to His people at all times, but especially in times of trial.

Well, these past two months I have had a very unbalanced work schedule and have been in-between projects. While this has been a source of stress, it has also been a blessing. It gave me the opportunity to spend more time in devotion. This extra time to spend in His word has been priceless. While I am still struggling with many things and some extreme emotions at times, I still know that there is a rock that I can lean on when I cannot stand on my own. Through prayer and meditation on the Lord's word, I am strengthened. This does not always mean that everything is going right or that I am even necessarily at peace within myself, but it strengthens my faith that these things too shall pass and that in the end, this will all be for the glory of God. In Romans 8:28 it says that "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."  

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All that to get to what I really wanted to share. During this time, I have been reading through the books of I & II Samuel, Kings, and Chronicles. (I highly recommend that if when reading these books that you read "The Kings of Israel" and "The Kings of Judah" by Dr. Brian Bailey as well to gain real insight into the lives of these kings) As I have read these books, I have been struck by many things, but there has been one thing in particular that I have been meditating on and that is how few of the kings remained faithful to the Lord.

King David, because of his steadfast love to the Lord, was given a great promise in 2 Samuel 7:12 that his house would be established forever. His son Solomon, who knew this promise, and who had the wisdom of the Lord, was led astry at the end of his life to worship other gods. Because of this,  the kingdom was torn apart, with only a remnant left to the house of David. The kingdom was saved from total destruction because of the righteousness of Solomon's father David. Throughout the history of Israel and Judah, it's kings saw the mighty hand of the Lord move in super natural ways that could not be denied. They were time and time again delivered from their enemies and given the blessings of the Lord and yet so many of them either were wicked from beginning to end or started out well and ended horribly. These men who were taught and warned by the Prophets of the Lord and yet led their countries to practice idolatry and such sin against the Lord. These men who let their hearts be led astray. 

It might seem a little odd that I found this a source of strength, but I really have, because even though so many of these kings had horrible ends, there were ones that finished their race, that remained faithful to the end. These men the Lord richly blessed and because of these righteous men, the Lord was able to show His great mercy to His people.

Reading through these Words have really renewed the cry in my heart for the Lord to change my heart, to purify it, to make it whole so that offenses, hurts, doubts, depression, and so many of those emotions that the enemy seeks to use to our detriment are unable to penetrate my heart. Lord I want to be faithful to the end. I don't want to get to the end of my life and then miss the mark. I don't want to have my heart drawn away by other loves. I want to finish my life and be able to say as Paul did in 2 Timothy, "I have fought a good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept my faith."